Reader I want to talk about something that is a constant struggle for me: Vulnerability.

I’ve been asking myself why it feels like such a battle, and I finally uncovered the "programming" behind it:

• As a child: I was celebrated for being "smart and competent." That competence earned me freedoms and opportunities others didn't get.
• In school: Getting it right the first time was praised; getting it wrong and learning was seen as a failure.
• At work: As a woman, I often felt I had to disprove the thesis that we are "less capable" by never showing a single crack in the armor.

That is decades of conditioning to overcome. But the truth I’ve had to face is that my "competence" was often just a mask for perfectionism—an internal lie fueled by insecurities around worthiness and the fear of rejection.

Reader, can you relate?

Last week, I had the privilege of running my workshop, "Fire Your Unreliable Narrator: Brain-based strategies for happier workdays," with the leadership team at Feeding America Kentucky Heartland.

The session is designed to help leaders interrupt the "mental autopilot" of unhelpful thoughts using this core framework:

On the surface, it seems simple and untroubling. In practice, however, it requires a significant component of team bonding and trust building—vulnerability.

Reader, the truth is that most of your unreliable narrator's stories center on the bad and the ugly rather than the good.

In this workshop, participants practice creating a safe space to examine and claim ownership regarding the power of those stories in shaping their unhappiness and self-limiting thoughts.

And the beautiful thing that emerges from that, like a butterfly emerging from the cocoon, is a new appreciation for our shared humanity with one another, and our ability to be more forgiving with ourselves and others because of it.

Reading Brené Brown and believing in the power of vulnerability are not the same as practicing vulnerability and making it a team norm through daily actions.

It is truly a transformative team experience.

Reader if you know of a team or a stage that needs to hear this message—or if your own leadership team is ready to fire their unreliable narrator—hit reply and let’s chat.

Have an awesome week!

​Catch Up on 'the story i'm telling myself' podcast​

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